To anyone following the blog, I'm sorry! The blog should be up again within the next few months.

The Lady Downstairs

Anyone who knows me is aware that I am a very friendly person.  I also like to give people the benefit of the doubt before I label them mental.  This should be a good quality, however it causes me a lot of grief!

An example of this is the woman downstairs...

A woman moved in below me about 2 weeks ago.  60 years old, talkative, breast-cancer survivor.  Upon our first meeting, she asked me if I would like for us to hide keys for one another to check on eachothers another cats if need ever be.  RED FLAG!  I found this odd, and of course did not agree, I just kind of brushed it off.  I figured, however, that I shouldn't just jump to conclusions about her.  She invited me down to her apartment last weekend and  we had pizza delivered.  We talked for a few hours, we swapped stories about our Eurpean travels.  She told me she used to work  in education, that she was on disability now and that her car had broken down.  I told her if she ever needed a ride anywhere to let me know.  She mentioned maybe going to the grociery store together Wedensday night.  I didn't really need to go to the grociery store, but I said sure.  She came over the next night to ask me if we were still on.  I said yes.  She stressed that if I couldn't drive her it was  no big deal, that she could take the bus.  Late that night I remembered that a friend of mine was coming over for a visit the next night (Wed. night).  I had her cell phone #, we had texted on occassion, but it was late and I didn't want to wake her.  She had left notes at my door before, so the next morning I left her a note apologizing.  I even said that I was going to the store on my lunch break and could pick anything up for her if she needed.  She later text me that she got my note and not to worry about it, to have a fun time.  The next morning outside my door there was a note from her...  One of the most rediculous notes I have ever read.  I felt like I was back in highschool!  "I no longer want to be acquainted with you, if you are going to ditch your female friend for a guys company then don't expect to keep any friends..."  This not was double-sided!!

She put off many red flags, but I had kept on ignoring them.  Maybe because I felt bad for her living down there all alone with no one to keep her company.  Maybe I thought I was being judgemental, because most of the people in my building are, shall we say, unkempt.  The lesson learned was that I should have trusted  my gut, my intuition.  Why don't we trust our instincts more?  You hear about it all the time, people who are abused in some way because they didn't want to come off as rude so ended up getting themselves into an unsafe situation. 

Always trust your instincts!!

Ignore-ance

A good friend and I were chatting this evening about men and how many of them would rather ignore than be honest.  Recently, someone I went to highschool with suggested that we go out for a drink sometimes, after he was unable to attend an event I had invited him too.  Now, if he didn't want to hang out, he could have just said he was busy, but he mentioned going out for a drink instead.  I waited a while to mention it again, I didn't want him to get the wrong idea.  This was a guy that I had liked in highschool, but a lot has changed in the past 10 years and I wouldn't think of him in that capacity now.  To me, this was literally going to be what it was, two people meeting for a drink to catch up.  It wasn't until he began ignoring  me (I didn't ask him why he wasn't responding, I figured it out on my own) that I realized two things.  1. He probably thought I was interested in him on more than a friend level and 2. He probably didn't want to hang out in the first place but was just trying to be polite.  Apparently, his politeness backfired on him, because it isn't making him seem very "polite" now. 

Since when did honesty become a bad thing?  I would much rather someone tell me "Sorry, I'm busy" and leave it at that, then have someone try to make me feel better only to make me feel worse later.  What started out as a simple thing was turned into quite an annoyance, because as girls we obssess.  Did I say something to give him the wrong idea?  Did he change his mind?  One way to get a girls attention is to ignore her.

Do you know what the act of ignoring is... ignorance.

Facebook Crushes

Facebook crushes are the best kinds of crushes to have.  You can swoon without ever having to worry about being obvious.  I know what you're thinking, this sounds stalkerish, right?  I'm not talking about facebook stalking.  Two TOTALLY different things.  A facebook crush's posts generally make you smile.  When they upload a new silly photo, you might experience a few butterflies.  On occassion, you may, yes, look at their page to see what they're up to.  This is not to be confused with being a facebook stalker!  If you frequent a guys page daily that you never speak to and find yourself reading every detail of his life, then you're a facebook stalker.  Unfortunately, these are the worst stalkers a person can have because we are completely unaware of them.  On the other hand, if you don't just accept any old friend request, and you have your profile set to private, then you are probably safe.

Facebook crushes are different.  My latest is an old friend of my brothers that lives a few states away.  He is always "liking" my posts, and when I read his they make me smile.  I have not seen this person since he was a child, so I can create my own idea of the man he is today soley based on what he decides to share on facebook.  There's no chance of being hurt, because I never see him face to face. 

I've had a few facebook crushes over the years.  They're fun while they last, but usually don't last too long.  I mean, eventually he will post something not to my liking and that'll be the end of that.

Horrifying

I just watched a film called "The Girl Next Door" that was based on true events.  It was about two girls whose parents died in the 50's. They go to live with their Aunt who is sadistic.  She assults them both, torturing one of them indescribably!  It had me in tears, knowing that this actually happened (or at least most of it.)  It reminded me of the book "A Child Called It" that I read on a train once while backpacking Europe.  In that case, it was the child's own mother who abused him.  How is it possible for people to be so sick and twisted?  It's bad enough that people come across strangers on a daily basis who are psychotic, but to think that some people find it within their own homes is so quite horrifying!

He MUST be gay.

A friend recently joked to me that I should give a guy a chance before I decide he is gay.  This got me thinking...  What if every time a guy was uninterested you just told yourself  "He must be gay."  Yes, it sounds rediculous, and odds are he isn't in the closet, but you never know.  If you could live in Lala Land and convince yourself that any man who was not interested in you was gay, just think of how much easier it would be.   You would never have to feel bad.  Your confidence would never dwindle. 

I had a crush on a guy a few years ago who was openly gay.  It was wonderful!  I could swoon over him knowing that nothing could ever come of it, but also knowing that it had absulutely, positively nothing to do with me.

Besides the fact that using this method causes one to be completely removed from reality, I'm quite enclined to start!

Online *cough* Dating

Yup, it's time to discuss the dreaded topic of online dating.  Most of us single girls have tried it before, most of us single girls don't like to admit that we have tried it before.  I have only met 1 man online that turned into any kind of "relationship."  It was a few years ago while I was living in TX.  We are still friends today.  I also have a met a few guys that I have stayed in touch with over the years on a friend level.  But for the most part, my online dating experience have been horendous!  The worst was about 8 years ago when a "date" shot up in front of me.  Yes, you read that right. (Hope Mom isn't reading this).  There was also the guy who showed me his gun collection on the 2nd date...

No matter how careful you try to be...

I know online dating has worked for many people, but I have to say I have had some very bad luck!  I'm to the point in my life where I'm not really that motivated to try to meet men.  I figure, if one pops up out of the blue, cool.  Otherwise, I guess I will remain single.

I say this now, but know that in a month I could get bored...